Down the Rabbit Hole (2004) - Chapter Eight: Highs and Lows

Down the Rabbit Hole: A Guide to Puck Bunnies (2004)
Written by Katrina Cady

Chapter Eight: Highs and Lows

The life of a puck bunny is like a drug. These women can experience tremendous highs and happiness. However, these feelings do not last very long considering the cost – their youth, and their innocence; nothing is free in the Rabbit Hole. Puck bunnies suffer depressing lows to match their every high. Puck-bunnyism is a hard stage of life. Young girls learn many of life’s lessons in a self-defeating fashion in this place. Some puck bunnies incur serious psychological damage by the time they reach graduation. The hardest part about their world is living in it.

Confidence Issues

As a young puck bunny begins her career in the Rabbit Hole, hockey players do wonders for her self-confidence. Plain girls, or girls who are not breath-taking beauties, catch the eye of the hockey players just as any other girl would. Girls who are normally intimidating to the average guy are not intimidating to hockey player because they are more self-confident than the typical teenaged male. Girls who once felt unattractive now feel like blossoming beauties.

By targeting women who may have low confidence, hockey players are able to effortlessly manipulate these girls into performing sexual favours for them. People with low self-confidence are easily persuaded into sexual activity because they enjoy the feelings of being desired. Outside of the Rabbit Hole, this behaviour is less destructive because the chances of being used are not as high as they are down the Hole.

The puck bunny experiences a rushing high when she makes a sexual transaction with a hockey player. She feels sexy and confident because, in her mind, hockey players are above all other types of men. Therefore, succeeding with them sexually makes her feel like she is more desirable than the average woman. The truth is crushing.

Soon after her sexual adventure with a hockey player, the puck bunny realizes that there will not be a repeat of that magical moment in her life – she has been used. The repercussions of that brief high are dangerously damaging, as this already fragile puck bunny now thinks she must have disgusted her lover. She begins to think that she is physically repulsive, and falls into a worse depression than the one she had already been nursing prior to her introduction to bunny culture.

In time the puck bunny realizes her physical attributes were not responsible for the events that transpired. However, this revelation is of little comfort to the puck bunny because she soon realizes the other hard fact about the Rabbit Hole – hockey players mistreat all women equally. Now this unconfident girl learns she was never special, never beautiful, and that she is just as unlovable as any other puck bunny.

Blackmail and Peer-Pressure

Sometimes a girl in a cluster of puck bunnies is forced to do things that she does not want to do. If a hockey player is pursuing a girl who is not reciprocating his interest, her Sisters will pressure into complying with his requests. These girls will build the ego of the targeted bunny by telling her how great she must be to have someone so amazing interested in her. Her Sisters’ excitement warps her perspective about surrendering to her pursuer.

If the targeted bunny is still unresponsive towards the hockey player, her Sisters will start to get vicious. They will lecture their Sister about keeping up relations with the hometown hockey team. They do not want to be on bad terms with the players because one of them failed to meet their demands. These girls will also threaten to cut off ties with her altogether, or create rumours to damage her reputation.

Ironically, once the hockey player gets what he wants from his prey, the other puck bunnies will turn on her. Inevitably, the hockey player will use the bunny he had been pursuing so diligently. Her Sisters will equate his sudden lack of interest in her with weakness. They will trash her to the hockey player because they are aiming to have her “sloppy seconds,” and maintain ties to his team. These bunnies will also exploit the events that occurred the night that they two parties had their exchange. The puck bunny’s character is blemished – damned if you do, damned if you don’t.

There is however, a light at the end of the tunnel. After using a puck bunny, a hockey player will often come crawling back. If this happens, the targeted bunny will have justice over her evil Sisters, as her former fling will want to attempt a relationship of some kind again. Of course, this relationship will likely end the same way the first did, but, at least her ex-Sisters will be miffed.

Broken Friendships

Broken friendships go hand-and-hand with blackmail and peer-pressure. When a group of friends develop puck bunny tendencies, their friendship becomes and entrepreneurial venture. Puck-bunnyism is an obsession with hockey players, and very often this obsession becomes a disease. The members of the cluster value hockey players above their once close friendship. They are willing to betray each other in favour of the success of their franchise.

Puck bunnies deal their friends the way they would deal playing cards. They maliciously hurt each other, deceive each other, and desert each other. They will do anything to increase their chances of succeeding with hockey players. To them hockey players are the drugs, and they are the heroin addicts.

Unlimited Sex

If a puck bunny is strong willed enough to be unfazed by the hurt of being desired solely for casual sex, then she can enjoy as much careless sex with as many partners as she wants. In today’s day and age, the rush of uninhibited sexuality can come to a screeching halt. If there is a sure place to contract a sexually transmitted disease it is in the Rabbit Hole. Hockey players have engaged in sexual intercourse with dozens of women; therefore, a puck bunny can never be sure that they are free of disease. If she contracts an STD, she may be stuck with it for the rest of her life. In the future, such conditions can put a strain on the relationship that a puck bunny will form with a man she truly cares about.

Five Ways to Assess if Your Hockey Player is Unclean

#1 He has tiny testicles and shaves his pubic hair. This means he probably had a recent bout of crabs. Since they shower together, he would not want to show his teammates what he is lacking unless he absolutely had…or anyone else for that matter.

#2 His jock strap is washed separately from the rest of his teammates, and he has his own personal water bottle on the bench.

#3 Every time you go to one of his games, you hear clusters of girls talking about the odd tattoo he has on his butt.

#4 His ex-girlfriends all have the same suspicious rash around their mouths.

#5 He always gets uncomfortable when you inquire about his sexual past, and will likely storm off when you ask if he has ever been tested for STDs. Later, you will discover him pouting on the bathroom floor, crouched in the fetal position.

Love in the Rabbit Hole

Falling in love with a hockey player is the worst thing that can happen to a puck bunny. There is nothing worse than the sting of unrequited love. I will never understand how any woman can come to fall in love with men like these, but, nevertheless, it is extremely common. Despite the lies, the infidelity, and the neglected needs, women still form romantic attachments to the men who hurt them.

I suspect sexual intercourse is largely responsible for these bonds. When a sexual element is added to a puck bunny/hockey player relationship it has serious repercussions more so than the standard coupled relationship. A hockey player tends to show interest in his puck bunny right up until the moment of copulation. Once intercourse has occurred, the hockey player’s competitive nature evokes a similar satisfaction to winning game seven. He feels this is the prize that he came for and now he can move on to the next series. Although sex is a significant factor in all relationships, hockey players tend to feel that they “win” sex simply because they are hockey players. If these feelings erupt, the hockey player will begin to despise his lover and discard her.

The puck bunny will be confused and crushed by these events. She cannot understand how giving the gift of her love and her body can be so thoughtlessly rejected. Puck bunnies are always hopeful that they will hit it off with a hockey player and that they will start dating. So before a sexual meeting has occurred, the puck bunny already has her hopes set on someday falling in love with her hockey player.

I think puck bunnies may start to believe that they are in love with hockey players. They believe it so strongly that they start to experience all the romantic highs of being in love. Once the puck bunnies realize the true nature of the hockey players, the blow is a lot harsher because they thought that they were in love.

Hockey players seem to hold relationships in the same regard as career transactions. They base romantic ties on getting the best possible deal for the cheapest price. As hockey players, they feel that they are superior to all men, that they have the brightest futures, and, above all, that they have the glory. In turn, they use women as a way to compliment their lifestyle – usually for convenient, sexual purposes. In order to find true love, a hockey player feels he must find a woman of equal or greater grandeur. This means that a hockey player must be with someone who is also moderately famous in her own right. However, these women are rarely accessible for non-professional hockey players. As glory is so important to the hockey player, they never do anything that is not for acclaim. Therefore, they covet the bragging rights of being with a woman of great social stature, This is, of course, the same reason puck bunnies desire hockey players, and so, one could argue that hockey players will not be satisfied until they, themselves, have become a bunny of some kind.

Dating a hockey player is not all it is cracked up to be. In fact, if a puck bunny does reach her goal and earn the Girlfriend status, she will come to discover that her relationship with a hockey player is probably the worst partnership of her entire life, and the biggest waste of time. A puck bunny, who forms an emotionally intimate union with a hockey player, sacrifices a lot – especially her happiness.

Top Ten Reasons to Date a Hockey Player

#10 They are very considerate when you are not in the mood for sex. They will simply find someone else to give them sexual relief. “Don’t worry, I won’t bang her. I just need to blow.”

#9 When you do want to have sex, they will be there for you in a heartbeat as long as it does not interfere with a game of practice.

#8 Due to years of competitive hockey, they have a lot of stamina (apparently).

#7 They have great bodies, which distracts from what is lacking in their faces.

#6 If you are having a bad hair and/or face day, they will be too busy staring at your breasts, and the ass of every woman that walks by, to notice.

#5 You will always be better looking than them.

#4 They are so busy with hockey that they don’t have time to be clingy. You will have plenty of “me time.”

#3 If you say something stupid, it is likely that they will not catch one.

#2 They are forced to shower at least once a day (after practice), so they probably smell OK.

#1 They are LOW maintenance. They barely talk, let alone, talk back.

A puck bunny’s life is what she makes of it. If someone chooses to pursue a career in the Rabbit Hole, they need to understand and accept the fact that they will encounter rough waters. A puck bunny will incur serious blows to her ego. Her success depends on how she handles her losses. Is the glass half empty or half full? Did she ruin her chances with the perfect guy, or are plenty of other hockey players out there just waiting to meet her? Puck bunnies never learn from the mistakes of others. A puck bunny will see how a hockey player has treated other women, yet does not believe that he will do the same to her. She finds out the hard way that hockey players do not change. Her mental health, and prosperity in the Rabbit Hole, depends on the strength of her confidence in herself.

To keep my account of the Rabbit Hole unbiased, I have asked hockey players to provide statements about their views on this world. Chapter Nine gives the boys a chance to discuss their thoughts on the subject. I found some of their opinions to be rather surprising.